Hey there, fellow ute lovers! Caine 'The Ute Enthusiast' Toad here, and today I've got a bone to pick with the latest buzz in the truck world - the Cybertruck - that shiny, stainless steel spectacle that's more reflective than a mirror in an outback dunny. Now, don't get me wrong, it's got its fair share of flash, but you might need sunglasses just to look at it without getting blinded! And let's not even start on the fingerprint fiesta it'll host - you'll spend more time polishing it than a croc does sunbaking. But here's the real question: beyond the glare and the glam, does it stack up in the gritty world of true truck functionality?

With its razor-sharp shell (and I don't just refer to the looks department here) and more tech under the hood than your local JB-HiFi store, it does have a fair share of bells and whistles: steer-by-wire, software updates from your lounge chair, cameras galore, and a ride height that's more adjustable than my grandad's recliner. But here's the rub: when it comes to the real nitty-gritty of truck functionality, I reckon it's a bit of a show pony.

Danger (R)ange(r)

First off, let's talk range. We're looking at 250 to 340 miles depending on your model choice, but that's probably with the roller tonneau zipped rolled up tight and the bed as empty as a ghost town. Us offroaders and overlanders, we kit out our rigs with the works - light bars, bullbars, roof racks, the whole shebang. And this stainless-steel-skinned beast? It might struggle under our kind of load. Throw in a boat or a camping trailer, and you're chewing through that range faster than a hungry dingo. And while there's an external battery pack to stretch those miles, it's a beast in itself, gobbling up space and weight.

It's a bit of a reach (Accessibility)

Now, let's chat about accessibility. If you've got your ute packed with gear - air compressors, sleeping bags, you name it - side access is as crucial as a cold beer on a hot day. But with the Cybertruck's design? It's like trying to get a snag from the back of the barbie - a bit of a stretch. And for the offroad warriors, how it'll handle the rough and tumble of the Aussie bush with its electronic stability control and wheel articulation is still a big question mark.

Now you see me

Visibility? Not the best. And that front camera can't double as a trail cam yet. Plus, here's a kicker - no spare tyre included. That's right, mates. If you want peace of mind, that's an extra 1,900 AUD, and you'll have to strap it down in the bed like a weekend DIY project.

Whaddayathink?

So, Caine, you might say, what's the verdict? Well, I think for those who need a truck that's a workhorse during the week and a warrior on the weekends, the Cybertruck might fall short. The range, loading capabilities, and overall practicality just aren't there yet - especially once you start adding aftermarket solutions, pushing the price sky-high. But you will probably see it in the more fancy suburbs of your capitol cities ... if ... and that's a big if ... that fridge-shaped door wedge even makes it to the Land of Downunder.

In Caine 'The Ute Enthusiast' Toad's book, the Cybertruck is a bit like a kangaroo in the headlights - looks interesting, but not quite ready for the rough and rugged outback of real truck use. Until next time, keep the rubber side down and your spirits high!